Entry 3

        Every person at one point in their life has experienced some type of adversity. Some crumble beneath it, some strive to get through it. To me, those are the two main types of people in this world. For me, I am one of those who pursues to fight through any difficulties I may face in life, that's just how I am and it's how I was raised. It wasn't until last spring when I faced what I would have to say was the most difficult time of my life: the death of my Grandmother. She was like a second mother to me, and I was her closest grandchild. She suffered many mental illnesses through the later terms of her life and had to be put in a nursing home. It broke my moms heart to have to do that, but with only my mother and uncle as the only two of four siblings to live in the area, they had to take action. I remember countless days of going to visit my grandmother at the nursing home, and having her illness get so bad, that she wouldn't even remember some of our names, like my dads, or even mine at one point. It was very hard on the family to see her suffer like this.
       Seeing my grandmother go through this and the effect that it had on my Dad and Mom really got to me. I began to feel really helpless, depressed, and even like I wasn't doing enough to help the situation. So I began to go in by myself to visit her to catch up, talk about my hockey games, girlfriend, you name it. It really put a smile on my grandma's face when she saw me walk in the room. From doing this I knew that when she finally went to the good Lord, it would really take a toll on me, and it did. I remember getting the phone call from my mom late at night and I instantly broke down into tears. Luckily, my perseverance, family, and faith in God helped me get through that very rough time. I haven't really created any barriers to keep me from this subject, I just choose to simply not talk about it. My mom was really the person I would go to to talk or grieve with after it had happened. After Grandma Tuke had passed, I really began to strive to work hard in everything I do to make her proud because I know how successful she wanted and knew I could be. This problem has nothing to do with my identity, its simply just one family member loving another family member, if anything it shows how caring and loving I can be at tough times. My self-efficacy has definitely gotten stronger from this situation, and I feel stronger as a person, and I feel that I learned how to better cope with adversity. The only way this effected my affective skill set was improving all of them. My problem solving skills are better, my coping skills have improved, I just really feel closer with my family after having to go through all of that, and for the first time in my life, really act like an adult to help comfort my mother.